A Growing Distaste for Compromise
I have an assignment for you, reader. Go watch this video: RIGHT NOW It's a TED talk about the metaphors we use to discuss sexuality, namely baseball, and proposing a new paradigm of pizza. Instead of the competitive win-lose nature of baseball, thinking about sex in terms of pizza provides a more collaborative, satisfying, and ultimately healthy view of relating to sexual partners. Seriously, go watch it. It's wonderful. I saw it last night during a presentation by Pittsburgh Action Against Rape (PAAR) as part of an educational series hosted by the local community. We even did an exercise wherein we all collaborated to build a pizza and then discussed the experience. It made me realize something important. I kind of hate the word "compromise." "But Anneke!" you might say, "You're a relationship coach! Aren't relationships built on compromise?" Some, maybe. But I would argue not the good ones. Compromising holds a connotation of settling. ...